Apparently, New Mexico is voting to have a state butterfly. Now, I was so appalled by statements like, "Butterflys are really cool right now" in the newspaper article, that I forgot to see if all states were doing this, or just our crappy, no-money-for-teachers-but-let's-prioritize-a-butterfly state. Does anyone know? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? (You see, if you've been reading my diary diligently at this point, you would realize I've used that joke before. Unoriginal!)
I have a big problem with the Goldfish commercials - and by that, I mean the Pepperidge Farm Goldfish. I hate these jingles. And they have lines like, "The wholesome snack that smiles back... until you bite their heads off!" Or, in the ever-popular Graham Goldfish jingle: "They smile because they haven't got a clue that they'll be eaten!" Now, now, Pepperidge Farm. Isn't this a little morbid, even for grown-ups? Isn't this a little too much? I wonder if the Goldfish jingle will be one of those things that people look back on in years & years and think that people must have been weirdos. They'll laugh & point, prodding their grandparents for information, information that they do not have! "We didn't know! We didn't know!" they'll cry from their balconies, their verandas... weeping, moaning for salvation!
Who sings that goddamn abomination of a song anyway? It sounds like Randy Newman's son. I hate Randy Newman too! Ahhhh! Will this torture ever end!?!
How nasty. There can be nothing grosser than the phrase "Jellied pig's feet headcheese." That might just be my new insult.
And... speaking of feet - Here's a list of how to prevent that problem you all keep emailing me about. Now you can relax in front of the TV with your friends, and without your stink.
C'est la vie, said the old folks... it goes to show you never can tell!