Last night, the train pulled in with me, Ludie, and Joey Joe Junior Shabadoo. We went bar-slutting, although I think our intention was to stay in one place. I think I only had 6 (maybe 7, and if so, that explains it) beers, but before we ever left the station, Ludie made us partake of THE WORST SCOTCH ON THE PLANET. It smelled like tequila, it looked like tequila - from Scotland, this was not. I got the dry heave after a little sip...
The night did go very well - I wasn't that drunk. But today I woke up with the vengeance of fifty drunk men inside my stomach which meant.... throw-up time! Bring on the nausea! Give her the shakes! Make her eyes water and her nose run! Give her a slight fever and then the chills! Yay! This body has had enough of this horseshit! We're giving this girl a taste of her own medicine! Let's see how she likes... du du dahhhhh!!! the CONSEQUENCES OF HER ACTIONS!
So I puked a lot of watery business that I can only assume was non-alcoholic since it was a good 9 hours after my last drink. And you know what? That's not fair! It's not fair to make a sober person throw-up! At least get it out when one is supremely good-spirited and drunk! Can I get a witness!?! Anyway, it looked like I was puking Lemon Ice Gatorade. End of puke story.
The credit card crap is getting exciting. I feel like I'm accomplishing things instead of the opposite, so that's good. My Providian (you know, the obviously prejudice/discriminatory commercial in which the Silver card belongs to a college student & the Hispanic mom, then the next level up - the Gold Card - belongs to an Afican-American man and a White woman, and then the highest level - Platinum - belongs to the White man? If I'd seen that commercial, I would not have gotten the card. Ha - yeah right, I was ready to blow some money I didn't have!!!) Visa is down to $950 or so. I think it might be $937? But when I started the stupid credit counseling, it was maxxed out at $2000. Wooooooo! Unfortunately, we can't celebrate this because I did so prematurely... and now I feel like ass!
I think there was a point last night where Ludie, Joey Joe Junior Shabadoo, and I all went tearing down the street like a bunch of Greasers - which also makes me think it was like a bunch of morons. And, if I remember correctly, I can take all sorts of the yummy goody gumdrop things that happened and blackmail the Big i with them. Or not, I am working on being nicer this year...
Alas, do not drink Swedish-bought Scotch, something with a pheasant on it, and do not ever use the women's bathrooms at Anodyne - they have saloon doors that are waist high, and everybody can see everything. Everything!