So - this jerky that Schmeon gave me is giving me the willies on how absolutely fantastic dried, salted, and chilied cow is. I love it. I love it more than any other dried, salted, and chilied meat. I suppose "cured" should be in that list, but who cares. The damn jerky will be my best man at my informal, cake wedding.
Work today was the most interesting day at a job I have ever had. Why, you ask? Well - I'll tell you why - I did all sorts of things & time just flew by. It flew! I watched it fly fly fly. I love office jobs. They are sooooo much easier than retail jobs. Retail jobs suck your lifeforce out, completely and entirely, and then prop you up in uncomfortable shoes for hours and hours until you can't stomach any more so you go to lunch, revive your vericose vein-laden legs and get ready for the homestretch. THERE IS NOTHING TO DO IN RETAIL JOBS. They are for the ugly, the stupid, the too-smart, the lazy, the general anesthetician - anyone, really. Because everyone hates it. Not a single person in the world can claim that they love workin' the floor at Sears. No one. If they do - they have had a frontal lobotomy without a doctor's supervision and should be rushed to the ER. Immediately, and without warning.
Another great thing about office jobs - THEY GIVE YOU COFFEE. Do you know that I have bought my own shite coffee from Starbuck's for the last three years? This is an amazing discovery, this office job!
I'm not really sure why, but isn't it interesting to note that candy companies continue to add lime & lemon flavors in their assortments? I always, always throw lime & lemon away. What's especially interesting is when people try to act like they like the lime & lemon, but really - they're just trying to be different. NOBODY LIKES A LEMON. AND NOBODY LIKES RETAIL JOBS. I'll be spitfire & damned when I meet some raggedy ol' ex-Olive Garden waitperson, eating a lemon gummy bear & applying for a retail position. I think that's how I'll go out - with a bang, a splash, and an unorthodox personality clashing with mine.
While there was no hot water for my shower this morning, there is hot water now! We are the envy of all projects all over the world! Pass me the jerky, slap me on the behind, and give me a beer, 'cos Mamma, I'm comin' home! YEEEHAW.