Like a lizard on a window pane

You know - I have very few regrets over not doing something. That whole seize the moment, live as if this was your last day - yada yada yada - it's bullshit. Almost all of my regrets are things that I have done. And they didn't make me any better of a person - so a million sitcoms are wrong when they have that lamby-eyed brooding intellectual, pining pining pining for his Aniston-esque love & never telling her, making the audience feel that he was wrong! He should have told her! I always tell everybody what I think of them - lamby-eyed or devil-tailed. Always. And I usually wish I hadn't done it - that I should have kept my mouth shut and stopped trying to "make things happen." Stupid stupid stupid! (and no - this has nothing to do with sex... read on, it's about a crack-licking shitty ass party)

I am saying this only because graduation is upon us like a filthy fly swatter gummed between a fat man's buttocks. You see, there is a wee party that is taking place that I have no interest in involving myself with, and I have been involved because I'm an idiot. And I started getting hopping mad when I was analyzing characters & situations, and my justification to not go through with this hoohaa is pretty mean-spirited. And I'm so sick of the parties! And I don't even know the people who are going to be coming! This is not how I would do a graduation party - this sucks!

Oh why oh why oh why couldn't I have had a graduation party with Eliza, or Shaba - or Schmeon? And didn't we just have a goddamn party? Why with these people that I don't like to hang out with?!? WHY IS THIS EVER-SO-FRUSTRATING? AND ALSO - if one more gnat flies around this po-dunk office - heads is rollin', I swear to God!

2003-05-14 | 4:27 p.m.

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