I don't see it that way, I don't see it that way...

You know it's going to be an interesting doctor visit when she walks in and says, "You're not going to faint on me again, are you?" So I got a little woozy, a little... how do you say? light-headed last time. I laughed and said, "No, no - I'll be fine." Yeah. Pff. Fine. Whatever. Long story short, I fell off the table and scared the shit out of the doctor. She said, "Man, you really want me to remember you, don't you? I see hundreds of people a week, and I still remember you." I think at that point I was cracking up, in my skivvies (which, really, is just some mutated vest thing and a napkin blanket), embarrassed to all hell. I cannot believe I slipped off the table, and two years ago, I'd fainted. I am a hazard to myself, I am, I am. Jesus, she must think I am a spastic colon, just waiting to POP out!

I was also thinking about how they should have a staircase like the one at Chambord so that you could leave the damn doctor's office without anyone seeing you (and unlike the link says, the King probably had the staircase like that so his mistress could sneak out the back without seeing the Queen. Er, that's what our guide said when we were there. The point is that I like that story better, but I think the Queens knew what the hell was going on anyway). But this is all obsolete since I guess the SHC couldn't afford Leonardo.

* Why oh why did I look at this???

* Subtle innuendos follow... must be something inside he's hiding!!!

* Bjork is touring!

Ludie had convinced me to go to church with her on Sunday, and I was going to go through with it in order to see if I was really going to be struck with lightning, and she was going to spy on some dude (our motivations are so noble). Now, all I can picture is Absolutely Fabulous being filmed in the damn Newman Center (which, by the way - new season for AbFab? Woohoo!!!). Alas, Ludie backed out, and we're not going. So I'll be sleeping in heavily zum Sonntag.

And, there's Ludie now - demanding an excursion for coffee... more later, if the fancy strikes me!

2003-02-06 | 10:42 a.m.

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