Extreme Makeover

So, I lightened my hair with Revlon's Ultra Soft Baby Blonde - Angel 10 min. hair color, and really, it did not turn out as expected. First of all, my hair is ridiculously fried, and I'm not sure why since I'm a veteran hair-colorer. Secondly, what I wanted to be soft and mildly platinum really looks like I grabbed a creamy yellow crayon and butchered a picture of myself with it. Third, the bigger and better plan was to start ratting it up, carry diet pills, swig whiskey and let cigarettes dangle from my bottom lip, you know -- sporting the Sandy-post-makeover-Grease look. ("What's it to ya, Stud?" etc.) This, so far, is not the case. I need serious revampification at this point, peeps. My look is boring and dated, and unfortunately, this latest hare-brained scheme did not pan out as expected. It could be the heat, though - I can blame anything on this ridiculous heat.

Although, I've been thinking about my whole "image concept" and perhaps this is too drastic for day. I think I need the following:
* One pr. of OneStars - while everyone and their mother had jumped on this AllStar trend, I have always been partial to the OneStar. I am going to get them in chocolate, so that they can match...
* One XS chocolate t-shirt from American Apparel (as well as a white one with green stitching, an asphalt one, and a red muscle tee)
* One pair of ridiculously not tailored flip flops. This should not be difficult, but somewhere along the line, I bought the flip-flop equivalent of grannie-panties. Shoot me now - time for a different pair.
* Because I got gum stuck to the side of my ballet flats (how this happened, I have no idea), I need a new pair of those as well.

See! This won't be too hard. T-shirts, sneakers, etc. How low maintenance is that? Then I can look like washed-up Texan beauty queen trash at night. Splendid.

2005-06-14 | 10:38 a.m.

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