More self-analysis, Less self-destruction
I was just watching
I Heart Huckabees with the director's commentary today, and there was one particular part in which D. Russell was explaining how contrary American women's lives are. This was happening during one of the imagination scenes of Albert where Naomi Watts is taking off her coverup shirt and she says, "Stop looking at me. I said - stop looking at me." This invited the comment that women crave attention and yet, they still say "Stop looking at me." I was applying this to my own life this evening - mainly due to the fact that when I go out now, I am overly paranoid that people are looking at me. Although when I'm out drinking and engaging in fantastic debauchery (ha!), I am not paranoid whatsoever. I suffer from this same paradox - give me attention and approval, but stop looking at me.
Another consequence of my overt social schedule is that the complete lack of inhibitions and normalcy at night are turning into ridiculously stuffy behavior for day. I'm sure this is regular for most people - don't dance unless you're drunk, can't approach people unless you're drunk (that one might be a little bad), don't feel comfortable in your own skin unless you're....
I digress.
2005-04-10 | 10:36 p.m.
